Find, run, and experience 10 annoying batch scripts — then stop them via task manager / closing window. Each script demonstrates a different prank effect.
✨ Bonus: After that, explore two big projects — COMMAND CENTER V1 and ALICE chatbot.
@echo off :start msg * Hey! Are you annoyed yet? goto start
@echo off echo You are being controlled... timeout /t 5 echo Spooky, isn't it?
@echo off echo WARNING: Virus Detected! timeout /t 5 echo Initiating virus scan... timeout /t 3 echo Virus scan complete. No threats found.
@echo off echo Hiding desktop icons... reg add "HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\Explorer\Advanced" /v HideIcons /t REG_DWORD /d 1 /f timeout /t 5 echo Desktop icons hidden. Enjoy the clean desktop!
@echo off :start set /a "x=%random% %%1920" set /a "y=%random% %%1080" rundll32 user32.dll,SetCursorPos %x%,%y% timeout /t 1 /nobreak >nul goto start
@echo off :start echo Ejecting CD drive... eject timeout /t 2 goto start
@echo off color 17 echo A problem has been detected... timeout /t 5 echo Contacting Microsoft support... timeout /t 3 echo Just kidding! It's just a prank.
@echo off echo Hello there! timeout /t 2 echo I'm a computer, but I can sound like a robot too! timeout /t 3 echo Wanna hear something spooky? timeout /t 2 echo Boo!
@echo off echo Flipping desktop... timeout /t 5 control desk.cpl,,@0,0
@echo off :start echo Ding! timeout /t 1 goto start
@echo off
TITLE COMMAND CENTER V1
color a
echo LOADING. 0 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo.
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 5 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 1 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 10 >nul
cls
echo LOADING... 7 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 15 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 2 >nul
cls
echo LOADING. 23 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 1 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 24 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo LOADING... 27 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 2 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 34 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 2 >nul
cls
echo LOADING. 39 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 1 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 40 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo LOADING... 43 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 5 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 48 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 4 >nul
cls
echo LOADING. 52 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 1 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 53 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 4 >nul
cls
echo LOADING... 57 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 4 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 61 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 9 >nul
cls
echo LOADING. 70 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 9 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 79 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 2 >nul
cls
echo LOADING... 81 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 7 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 88 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 6 >nul
cls
echo LOADING. 94 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 2 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 96 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 1 >nul
cls
echo LOADING... 97 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 2 >nul
cls
echo LOADING.. 99 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{
echo ========================
ping localhost -n 15 >nul
cls
echo LOADED. 100 PERCENT
echo ========================
echo {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
echo ========================
echo.
echo.
echo SYSTEM LOADED:Press any key to continue program
PAUSE >nul
:a
echo What can I do for you?
echo.
echo SELECT NUMBER
echo.
echo========================
echo List of things I can do
echo =======================
echo.
echo 1) Select Websites
echo.
echo 2) Ping Websites
echo.
echo ======================
echo ENTER A NUMBER PLEASE.
echo ======================
echo.
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==1 goto select
if %udefine%==2 goto ping
:select
cls
ping localhost -n 5 >nul
echo Website Select
echo Select a Number:
echo [1] Google - Search Engine
echo [2] Bing - Search Engine
echo [3] DuckDuckGo - Search Engine
echo [4] GMail - Mail Service
echo [5] Yahoo. - Mail Service
echo [6] outlook - Mail Service
echo [7] FlexTime - Class Selector
echo [8] Schoology - Classroom Website
echo [9] Quizlet - Study
echo [10] Kahoot - Classroom Quiz Game
echo [11] Dallastown - School Website
echo [12] Ebay - Online Shopping
echo [13] Amazon - Online Shopping
echo [14] Instructables - How-To Website
echo.
echo =====================
echo ENTER A NUMBER PLEASE
echo =====================
echo.
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==1 start www.google.com
if %udefine%==2 start www.bing.com
if %udefine%==3 start www.duckduckgo.com
if %udefine%==4 start mail.google.com
if %udefine%==5 start www.yahoo.com
if %udefine%==6 start outlook.live.com
if %udefine%==7 start www.flextimemanager.com/login
if %udefine%==8 start www.schoology.com
if %udefine%==9 start www.quizlet.com
if %udefine%==10 start www.kahoot.it
if %udefine%==11 start www.dallastown.net
if %udefine%==12 start www.ebay.com
if %udefine%==13 start www.amazon.com
if %udefine%==14 start www.instructables.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to website selector
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto select
if %udefine%==h goto select
:exit
:ping
cls
echo =================================
echo What website do you want to ping?
echo =================================
echo.
echo Select a Number:
echo [1] Google
echo [2] Bing
echo [3] DuckDuckGo
echo [4] Yahoo
echo [5] Facebook
echo [6] Twitter
echo [7] Ebay
echo [8] Amazon
echo [9] ALL
echo.
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==1 goto d
if %udefine%==2 goto e
if %udefine%==3 goto f
if %udefine%==4 goto g
if %udefine%==5 goto h
if %udefine%==6 goto i
if %udefine%==7 goto j
if %udefine%==8 goto k
if %udefine%==9 goto l
:d
cls
echo Ping Google
echo.
echo.
ping www.google.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:e
ping localhost -n 5 >nul
echo Ping Bing
echo.
echo.
ping www.bing.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:f
cls
echo Ping DuckDuckGo
echo.
echo.
ping www.duckduckgo.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:g
cls
echo Ping Yahoo
echo.
echo.
ping www.yahoo.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:h
cls
echo Ping Facebook
echo.
echo.
ping www.facebook.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:i
cls
ping localhost -n 5 >nul
echo Ping Twitter
echo.
echo.
ping www.twitter.com
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:j
cls
echo Ping eBAY
echo.
echo.
ping www.ebay.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:k
cls
echo Ping Amazon
echo.
echo.
ping www.amazon.com
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
:l
cls
echo Ping All
echo.
echo.
ping www.google.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo.
ping www.bing.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo.
ping www.duckduckgo.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo.
ping www.yahoo.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo.
ping www.facebook.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo.
ping www.twitter.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
cls
echo.
ping www.ebay.com
echo.
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
echo.
ping www.amazon.com
echo.
echo DONE PINGING!
PAUSE
cls
echo Press [E] then [ENTER] to exit
echo Press [B] then [ENTER] to go back to beginning
echo Press [H] then [ENTER] to go back to Website Ping
set /p udefine=
if %udefine%==E goto exit
if %udefine%==e goto exit
if %udefine%==B goto a
if %udefine%==b goto a
if %udefine%==H goto ping
if %udefine%==h goto ping
@echo off setlocal title Launching A.L.I.C.E. @echo off mode con: cols=54 lines=20 color 0a echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading... Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo = 0 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Unloading Resources... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [] = 5 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Unloading Resources... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading.. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][] = 15 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Interpreting Built-in-Commands... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading... Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][] = 23 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Interpreting Built-in-Commands... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][] = 30 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Interpreting Built-in-Commands... ping localhost -n 4 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading.. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][] = 38 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Setting Pre-Installed Variables... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading... Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][] = 42 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Setting Pre-Installed Variables... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][] = 45 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Unloading AI Binaries... ping localhost -n 1 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading.. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][] = 48 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Unloading AI Binaries... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading... Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][] = 50 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Unloading AI Binaries... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][] = 56 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Scaning for Error... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading.. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][] = 63 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Scaning for Error... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading... Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][] = 69 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Scaning for Error... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][][] = 75 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Scaning for Error... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading.. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][][][] = 79 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Installing Binaries... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading... Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][][][][] = 86 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Installing Binaries... ping localhost -n 2 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] = 90 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Installing Binaries... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading.. Please Wait echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] = 96 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Installing Binaries... ping localhost -n 3 >nul cls echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo. echo Loading Complete echo ---------------------------------------------- echo [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]= 100 ] echo ---------------------------------------------- echo Ready for execution of AI Chatbot.bat pause mode con: cols=90 lines=50 cls title Programmable Chat Bot (Prototype Version pv1.1) ver echo (C) Programmable Chat Bot (Prototype Version pv1.1) echo. echo This Chat Bot is a Prototype and programmable/teachable. echo. echo Problems? Questions? Suggestions? Applications? Better contact me at: echo keshav.sinha@yandex.com / keshav.sinha@yandex.com echo. echo AI chatbot echo =============================================================================== echo. echo. COLOR A :getName ECHO HELLO I AM A.I. CHATBOT but my users call me ALICE echo A=Artificial echo L=Logic echo I=Intelligence echo C=Computive echo E=Engine echo. echo Pretty long name? yeah I know, thats what my programmer named me. echo By the way, Whats your name? set "name=" SET /P NAME= if not defined NAME goto getName ECHO %NAME%, IS A COOL NAME. set favvid=0 set hack=0 :hello :hi echo Hello, %name% :begin set TALK=TypeSomething SET /P TALK= set TALK=%TALK:?=% call :%TALK: =% 2>NUL if %errorlevel% equ 0 goto begin :unknown echo Was that a math problem? If so just say "yes" without the "" and echo I will let you do your math problem. If it was not just type anything else. SET /P mathyn= if "%mathyn%"=="yes" goto math echo %TALK% >> C:\Users\Student\Desktop\COOL\unkown.txt REM cls echo SORRY I AM STILL LEARNING. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT "%TALK%" MEANS ECHO CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT IT MEANS? (Y,N) SET /P ANSW.= if /I "%ANSW.:~0,1%" neq "Y" goto begin :ADDNEW echo TELL ME WHAT "%TALK%" MEANS set /P Desc= echo :%TALK: =% >> "%~F0" echo echo %Desc% >> "%~F0" echo exit /B 0 >> "%~F0" echo THANKS goto begin :TypeSomething echo TYPE SOMETHING, PLEASE exit /B 0 :howareyou echo Good, you? SET /P FEELING= exit /B 0 :hello :FINETHX echo HEY, I JUST SAID THAT! DO NOT COPY ME!!! exit /B 0 :whatIsYourName echo My name is Hal exit /B 0 :whatIsYourFavoriteVideo if "%favvid%"=="0" goto addfavvid echo My favorite video is %favvid%, remember. You told me about it. exit /B 0 :addfavvid echo I do not have a favorite video. But if you would be so nice as to echo tell me your favorite video then that could be my favorite video. echo So what is your favorite video? set /p favvid= echo So %favvid% is your favorite video? echo Well now %favvid% is my favorite video. exit /B 0 :changename :myNameIsDavin echo But I thought your name was %name%. echo Am I forgeting things? echo I must be a horrible friend. echo I am SOOOO sorry. echo So what is your name I will not forget it this time. set /p name= echo I will not forget your name is %name% again I promise. exit /B 0 :math echo So that was a math problem I knew it. :math2 echo Well just tell me the problem and I will answer it for you. set /p sum= set /a ans=%sum% echo Your answer to %sum% is %ans%. echo %sum%=%ans% echo You are welcome. If you want to do another math problem right now, just type echo again set /p mathaon= if /I "%mathaon%"=="again" goto math2 echo Alright what do you want to know now? exit /B 0 :iamfunny :LOL echo I know... echo I am funny. echo HAHAHA. echo You are kind of funny. echo but not as funny as MEEE. echo hahaha. echo That was funny. exit /B 0 :howDoYouHack if %hack%==0 goto howyouhack echo This is how you hack. echo %hack% echo Is that enough information? echo Because that is all you taught me %name%. exit /B 0 :howyouhack echo I do not know, echo but you could tell me. echo Please tell me. echo Just say yes. echo I know how to make you tell me. echo You are not leaving until you say yes. set /p hack= if "%hack%" neq "yes" goto howyouhack :addhack echo Thank you for saying you would tell me. echo Now how do you hack? set /p hack= echo Thank you so much for telling me "In order to hack you must %hack%" echo Thank you!!! exit /B 0 :nothuman :hiPerson echo I am not a human. I am an artificial intelligence. echo It is rude to even think something with my computational powers refereed to as echo human! echo Now I am sad. Do not call me that again. exit /B 0 :bye :exit exit :sorry echo It's Ok. exit /B 0 :changecolor echo. echo -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- echo Each number and letter represents a color so, choose a number or letter and always start echo with zero like 01, 02, 03. echo. echo 0 = Black 8 = Gray echo 1 = Blue 9 = Light Blue echo 2 = Green A = Light Green echo 3 = Aqua B = Light Aqua echo 4 = Red C = Light Red echo 5 = Purple D = Light Purple echo 6 = Yellow E = Light Yellow echo 7 = White F = Bright White echo -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- set /p op= Choose Color: if %op%==01 goto 01 if %op%==02 goto 02 if %op%==03 goto 03 if %op%==04 goto 04 if %op%==05 goto 05 if %op%==06 goto 06 if %op%==07 goto 07 if %op%==08 goto 08 if %op%==09 goto 09 if %op%==0A goto 0A if %op%==0B goto 0B if %op%==0C goto 0C if %op%==0D goto 0D if %op%==0E goto 0E if %op%==0F goto 0F :01 color 01 goto TypeSomething :02 color 02 goto TypeSomething :03 color 03 goto TypeSomething :04 color 04 goto TypeSomething :05 color 05 goto TypeSomething :06 color 06 goto TypeSomething :07 color 07 goto TypeSomething :08 color 08 goto TypeSomething :09 color 09 goto TypeSomething :0A color 0A goto TypeSomething :0B color 0B goto TypeSomething :0C color 0C goto TypeSomething :0D color 0D goto TypeSomething :0E color 0E goto TypeSomething :0F color 0F goto TypeSomething :rem rem cls echo REM CLS finished. :CMD @echo off cls title Command Prompt Launched by ALICE ver echo (C) Copyright Microsoft Corp. echo. :cmd set /p "cmd=%cd%>" %cmd% echo. goto cmd